Have I finally taught myself to become numb to an emotion everybody else is talking about...feeling...appreciating? It only seemed like yesterday when I felt the piercing, and I imagined myself taking revenge on an affection that never meant to bring forth hatred, only solace and distress, so as to make us realize the importance of cherishing happy moments. I remember how I couldn't wait to see a reflection in the mirror of a girl who has been set free from the clutches of faded hopes and dreams, of how I prayed for the hurting to stop and enable me to forget all that was, of how I pushed myself to forgive...to forgive him...but most especially, to forgive myself...
Every decision I made was never forced nor commanded...my actions were expressions of how much I loved him because I knew nothing in this world's ever permanent.
I loved him. I don't only think that...because I really did.
Perhaps this is the reason why I'm taking it easy this time, giving myself the chance to breathe and embrace myself. It gets tiring to pretend that one is strong when in fact is not.
Now, I am unfeeling, incapable of loving...still a victim of the past...
So, do I still love him?
Could it be possible for somebody numb to still love?
Until when?
